Since we work with children every single day at First Class Child Development Center, we get a lot of questions from parents about parenting in general. As educators and child care providers, we may not always know the answer to these types of questions, but we always want to make sure we are being a helpful resource for the children we teach, as well as their parents. With this in mind, we have done research to uncover answers to some of the most common questions we get from the parents at First Class. Continue reading below to learn more about parenting styles and how they affect the overall development of your child.
“I feel like I am always telling my child “no” and I don’t know how to adjust once my patience has run out. Help!”
Patience is certainly something you never truly know the meaning of until you are a parent. After all, sitting in traffic has nothing on sitting in traffic with a 4-year-old in the backseat. First, we would just like to remind you that you are not alone when it comes to wishing you were less reactive when it comes to your kids. We are sure that every single parent on the planet feels this way at one time or another. The key, however, is to practice being responsive rather than reactive in situations that are wearing on your sanity. First remind yourself that persisting to get what they want is absolutely typical for a child. If there has been a strategy that your child has used in the past to get their way and it worked, you can guarantee they will continue to use that tactic until a clear line has been drawn and a boundary set. When you approach instances of your child annoying you by being empathetic rather than angry, you will be able to be most effective and much less regretful about having lost your cool.
If you want to avoid situations like this entirely, the most effective way to respond is to be clear about what your expectations are for your child from the get-go. For example, if your kiddo refuses to clean up their toys and go to bed, simply state what your expectation is while also acknowledging your child’s feelings. By saying something like “I know you are upset that playtime is over, but time is up. We’re going to bed.” In a scenario like this, you have set the expectation and you remain in control. At the same time, you are showing your child that you know where he/she is coming from, allowing there to be mutual respect and understanding between the two of you.
“What are the best tips you can give to a single parent who is struggling to create a parenting style?”
It is well-known that single-parenting can be quite the challenge. However, what is most important to remember is that research has shown that children really only need one person who is a constant in their life in order to get everything they need. So long as there is a parental figure who provides safety, security, and adores them, a child can have all of the confidence, comfort, and self-esteem they need to be quite successful in life.
One of the biggest issues we hear that single parents have is the inability to set limits for their child. However, it is important that you remember that limits are loving and will absolutely benefit your child in the long run.
The key is to enforce these limits with love. Just because your child is reacting in a way that is not acceptable, does not mean you have to respond in a way that is also unacceptable. Modeling good behavior and validating your child’s feelings is the key to creating an understanding and respectful relationship between the two of you.
“Is there a way to encourage my children to be self-confident without overindulging them?”
We know it might sound a bit contradictory, but you can actually build your child’s confidence by NOT overindulging them. What we mean by this is, you should never do anything for your child when you know that they can do said task on their own. When you do this, you are allowing your child to develop new skill sets without him/her having to rely on you. While it is our desire for our children to always need us, from a developmental perspective, allowing your kid to face a child on their own is much more likely to render a positive result than the alternative.
Enroll Your Child in the Right Preschool
If you want to make sure your child is getting the right guidance outside of the home as well, it is important that you enroll him or her in a preschool that places emphasis on proper child development. At First Class Child Development, it’s in our name, so you know this focus is also very present in our classrooms. Contact us today to learn more about our school!